Thursday, April 26, 2012


What does belonging mean to you? Do you like to be part of something, does it make you feel good? For me it's a really important part of my helps to give my life meaning and it makes me happy.

Did I tel you I started a new job recently? I'm working in the prep room at the school our kids attend, and I'm loving it! It's so nice to have something new in my life, to be back at work, even though it is only a couple of mornings a week.

When I left my previous position, when I was pregnant with Lucy, I remember the first few days at home so well. Instead of feeling happy to be finished with work I was really struck by the sudden lack of contact with others.

 No one emailed me anymore! My inbox was empty. No one to have lunch with, chat with, I felt really lonely at the time. In hindsight that sudden isolation probably contributed to what turned into post natal depression, it was a difficult time. I often wonder if having a blog during that time would have helped, I like the way new mums can now use the internet to stay in touch with the world, and other people.

Anyway, lately I've been having the reverse experience! I feel super duper connected. It's nice to be involved in the community of the classroom, of the school, as a worker, as well as a parent. I'm enjoying the satisfaction of helping the preppies with their learning, and just being with this gorgeous group of kids is so inspiring and fun. I've been at home a LONG time with my kids and have never regretted it.

 It's always been a priority for me to be there for them in their young years and I've been lucky that I haven't had to work. But any mum knows that it's not always easy, and the space for myself has been pretty limited. So I'm happy, happy, happy to be working!

Not that I've been stuck at home on my own for the last 12 years. I've alway liked to do community based things and I really like to volunteer and be involved. So you can imagine how much I am also LOVING helping out at our new community op shop!  So many great people have come together to make this op shop happen and although I've only done a few hours I"m looking forward to my regular Friday spot. I like that I'm helping those in need, socialising with different people, contributing, belonging.

Yesterday our family went to our local Anzac Day parade and ceremony. The kids held our school banner and marched with their friends down the main street, in support of the brave men and women who fought & died for our country.

It's so good for them to learn about our history, about people who lived before them and have an understanding of how war effects us all. It was a very moving ceremony and I was so glad we were there, to be involved, to be sharing this important event.

Our kids belong to a local football and netball club. It's a very family oriented club and a great way for the kids to learn skills, make friends, see some other parts of Victoria and to have the opportunity to be part of a team. Sometimes they win, sometimes they lose. I don't get to go often enough because I'm usually caught up with the ballet world on Saturdays, but that's ok. Mark is great at taking the older two and I hope we can do swapsies sometimes so we both get to have a turn. I like that my kids are learning the beauty of community, of being part of something bigger than themselves, that they belong.

Lately I've been aware that my interest in blogging is fading a little, I'm just not so motivated to read other blogs or to crap on about my own life too much. I've been thinking about it a lot. Should I just finish up? Should I make more of an effort? What the hell is going on with I just plain lazy?? Why don't I seem to have the time to read about other people's lives anymore? Am I a really crap blogger???

Anyway, the only conclusion I have come to is that I'm too busy belonging in the real world. I love my bloggy friends, I really like my own little blog space so it's not that. I just really love all the things I"m involved with that aren't online and this doesn't leave much time for blogging.

So I'm not going to throw in the towel, I'll still be around here and there. I'm sorry I haven't visited you, it's not that I don't care. I think I've just found lately that my belonging spaces are elsewhere. (Hey that all rhymed...!)

 I hope I'll still have some belonging space in blog land too. We'll see. In the mean time I'd love to hear about what belonging means to you. Are you involved in your community? Does it give you something that makes you feel good too? Do you ever feel a bit isolated or disconnected? Sometimes it's harder in the city but I know that everywhere there is a place for someone, for some kind of belonging. Because we are all important, we all matter and sometimes we need to look outside of ourselves, to find out just how much.
Hope to see you soon  lovely ones...xo


Lindy in Brisbane said...

I don't care that you blog infrequently, but I do love that you still do it occasionally. It's so nice to catch up with you and your family, even though I am a total stranger to you. I find your blog so lovely and uplifting. And even when things aren't going so well, it's nice that I can comment here and feel as though I might be able to cheer you up a little.
And friends don't mind if you don't call for a while, they're just happy when you do!

mel @ loved handmade said...

So pleased you're enjoying your work Beck. I've been loving getting back into the classroom with the preppies, it's very rewarding! Im glad too that you're keeping your blog, it's always nice to visit your place. I haven't been visiting many of late either, other things are just needing more attention, but it's nice to do when there's time. Loving your instagram feed to bits..x

Maxabella said...

Perfect, Beck. Just perfect. x

flowerpress said...

Its funny isn't it, I think a few of us are feeling a bit like that. I think instagram is to 'blame', by giving us a quicker easier way to keep up with our bloggy mates.
I've been making a conscious effort to keep up my blogging because I would be sad to lose it, and I like the story behind the pictures. Which is why I always love your posts :-)

Floss said...

Hello, you are so NOT cr*p!

One of the things that makes each post so charming is your vibrant life outside of blogging. So the frequency of the posts doesn't matter at all - it's just lovely to have a glimpse into your world. I'm really pleased to hear about your job.

I've found blogging very important as an 'exile'. I love being in France but I needed to blab on in English to like-minded friends. Hurray for blogging! But like you I'm doing a bit less (despite not being on Instagram) - real life is lovely too.

teddybearswednesday said...

A fabulous post Beck and total proof you are not a crap blogger.
Exciting about the new job, and you know I agree with having a job you enjoy is a wonderful thing and can give you a sense of belonging. Amoung other things.
and how important it is to feel that. I've been going through a bit of the same thing with my blog and asking myself the same questions. For now i've decided not to call it a day, but give myself less of a hard time about it if I'm not in the mood don't have the time.
I've wondered too, how much I belong in the blog community too at times, not being a mum and all.
I guess if I were honest i'm still searching in some way for that feeling of belonging, i have it some areas, but i guess in the deeper sense of not having a family or partner of my own, i can feel a bit lost.
anyway fabulous post, sorry about the long rambling comment xo

hester said...

You are about the least cr*p blogger I have come across, Beck! Your blog is always beautiful in all senses of the word. We can all relate to that sense of blogging taking up valuable time that we could be doing other special things with. The real world is always calling, isn't it? I love to feel that sense of belonging and have found it blogging, at our school and in my little and extended family. If you do stop blogging, we will all enjoy rereading the old posts, so don't feel under any pressure!

Alma said...

The world needs you now Beck!
I love your blog because you live life simply and enjoy the moments. You are a beautiful creator and mom. I have felt like this too and struggle to find a balance. But life is richer unplugged so go live it and tell me when you get back.
(By the way I also have a Lucy who is now three)

Alma said...

The world needs you now Beck!
I love your blog because you live life simply and enjoy the moments. You are a beautiful creator and mom. I have felt like this too and struggle to find a balance. But life is richer unplugged so go live it and tell me when you get back.
(By the way I also have a Lucy who is now three)

Tania said...

I'm so glad I popped by - not that there's any surprise in that. Totally riding the same wave and it's all fine with me. But so, so lovely to be able to pop my head in at your door!

Mike said...

I'm happy you have a new job. Jobs can give us purpose and they also give us independence. I love the picture of the gooses.